I work as a part-time writing resource teacher in a public elementary school. A big part of my job involves talking to students about their writing. Among other things, we discuss confusing sentences, dangling plot lines, bland descriptions, and left-out details important to the reader’s understanding of the story.

.

Here’s an example of a conference with a student I will name David:

.

Me: “What’s going to happen with your main character? How will he change?”

.

David: “He’s going to get superpowers!”

.

Me: “How?”

.

David: “He steps in goo. The goo is radioactive and it gives him super hearing, super vision, super speed, etc….”

.

I look at David’s story. It says the main character “stepped in some goo” during a walk in the woods. After that, he goes home. There is no description of the goo or radioactivity. The main character doesn’t even notice the goo on his shoe. The reader has no hint that something life-changing has occurred.

.

“Tell us more about the goo,” I say. “It’s important.”

.

David agrees and picks up his pencil to revise.

.

Another example comes from a student I’ll call Elliott. His story begins with the line, “Attention! All the experiments have escaped from the lab.”

.

Elliott reads his first paragraph and excitedly tells me that the first lines of dialogue are being delivered through a screen in a video chat.

.

“Did you tell the reader that?” I ask.

.

“No,” Elliott says, “but I can.”

.

Both Elliott and David have made a mistake I’ve made in my own writing. I call it “forgetting the reader.” As a writer, I know all the necessary background material and character motivation for my story. However, sometimes I forget to share it, especially when I write on Jewish themes. I am fortunate to belong to a writing group with writers of different faiths who will remind me that non-Jewish readers won’t necessarily know that Rosh Hashanah begins at sundown or that blessings are said over apples and honey. I need to explain such things so my reader won’t be confused. A few months ago, while I was working on a picture book manuscript, my writing group pointed out that I didn’t tell the reader my story began the day before Rosh Hashanah. Since this was crucial to the plot, it was a serious mistake that I was grateful my critique group caught.

.

As I work with students, I freely admit that sometimes I need others to tell me when I have forgotten my reader. And when I sit down at the computer to write, I often hear my own voice asking a student, “Is that clear to the reader?” Teaching can be a good reminder to take my own advice.

.

Thanks for Reading JWorld Café, the Poetica Magazine Blog

Jacqueline Jules, Guest Blogger

.

Jacqueline Jules is an award-winning children’s author and poet. Her books include The Hardest Word, The Princess and the Ziz, Abraham’s Search for God, Sarah Laughs, Benjamin and the Silver Goblet, and the recently released, Miriam in the Desert. For more information, please visit www.jacquelinejules.com.  - Linda Pressman, Blog Editor